Proof Enough
by Inverse-chan
Summary: Tokyo Babylon Drabbles, mostly SS. Some knowledge of X is needed for certain drabbles. Individual warnings and ratings posted inside. TRIPLE UPDATE. Drabbles 8-10 up.
1. Proof Enough

**Series: **Tokyo Babylon  
**Title: **Proof enough  
**Rating: **PG-13  
**Pairing/ Characters: **Subaru X Seishiro; Hokuto  
**Word Count: **227  
**Warning/s: **You need to be done with the series to read this, or it'll ruin the ending for you. Angsty. A little X knowledge would be nice as well, but it's not necessary.  
**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything.

* * *

There is no one emotion more consuming than love. 

His smoking of his Mild Sevens, and his billowing trench coat were proof enough of that.

There is no one emotion more destructive than hate.

His almost obsessive search for his sister's killer, and his disgust at his own weakness were proof enough of that.

Subaru wasn't all that certain how he could feel such extremes at the same time, concerning the same person. He wasn't sure if it was possible, even though he himself was living proof of unending love, and unquenchable hate. The only thing he was sure of, was that he had somehow warped, twisted and broken. And that the gradual emotional blending of white and gray and black had snapped, shattered like a mirror. And the shards of gray had somehow sunk away, until only the stark colors of white and black were left, standing much too close together for comfort.

They were much too close for sanity.

And still, Subaru continued to smoke his Mild Sevens, to wear the white trench, to loathe himself, and to search for his sister's killer, and the only remaining person who he loved.

…_Seishiro-san…_

He wasn't confused. He knew what his emotions were, he knew what they meant. He knew what he wanted, and what he needed.

He just wasn't sure he was sane enough to care.


	2. Hunger

**Series: **Tokyo Babylon  
**Title: **Hunger  
**Rating: **PG-13  
**Pairing/ Characters: **Subaru X Seishiro  
**Word Count:** 152  
**Warning/s:** You need to be done with the series to read this, or it'll ruin the ending for you. Angsty.

* * *

There is a hunger that can't be sated, a thirst that can never be quenched. 

If you think it's love, than you're a fool.

It's the unplaced longing of a soul denied, a soul searching for something it is not sure of, a soul searching for something that very well may not exist.

And of course, you try to satisfy the longing. But it's actually quite hard to do when you're not sure what you're longing for.

Companionship, money, happiness, nourishment...

You travel to the ends of the earth searching. You don't know what it is, but it presses upon you harder until you can't sleep in wonderment of what possible could possess you so strongly. It's not anything you thought it might be, it's not anything ordinary that may satisfy everyone else.

When you finally find it, you're not sure if you should have given into the longing after all.

Seishiro-san.


	3. Barren Legacy

**Series: **X/1999  
**Title: **Barren Legacy  
**Rating: **PG-13  
**Pairing/ Characters: **Subaru/Seishiro  
**Word Count: **257  
**Warning/s: **Spoilers for Rainbow Bridge, and a little of what happens after.

* * *

The house of Sakurazuka was very neat, to say the least. When Subaru first entered, it seemed as if there was not a single thing out of place. It was as if everything had been meticulously set down, to give the impression of normality. 

But there were no pictures, of course. They would seem silly in a place of such simulated perfection. Pictured bring with them names, and with names, memories. The Sakurazuka had needed neither frivolous connection.

And Seishiro-san could not have actually lived there, Subaru was sure. The house was too airy, free from the heavy burden of cigarette fumes for Seishiro to have done more than occasionally visit.

But this was the house of Sakurazuka; this had been Seishiro's _home_. And he had been there recently – there was an old cup of tea on the coffee table in the sitting room. It could not have been more than a week old.

Subaru looked down at himself, with the same empty expression he had surveyed the house with. This is what _that_ man had left him, an empty house devoid of pictures and any object with emotional value, a half empty cup of tea, and a white trench coat covered in the same blood that still flaked off of his hands and crusted under his fingernails. _That _man, Seishiro, had taken everything that had ever mattered in Subaru's life and returned only items cold and barren.

But these things, these _unwanted_ things, were from _Seishiro-san_. These things carried his legacy. And Subaru could not refuse.


	4. A Thing Like Eating

**Series: **X/1999  
**Title: **A Thing Like Eating  
**Rating: **G  
**Pairing/ Characters: **Subaru/Seishiro  
**Word Count: **123  
**Warning/s: **Uh… none really.  
**Disclaimer: **X1999 is not mine.

oooooooooo

Subaru does not starve himself. That does not mean that he eats properly – only that he does not go out of his way to avoid food, and does try to maintain his good nutrition when he remembers, and cares, to do so.

It is only that eating seems unnecessary, when put into the context of his life. There were precious few who actually cared about him, and then there was the fact that he did not value the opinions of those who worried.

A moment spent eating was a moment lost – a moment that could be spent tracking down the only person he wanted to care.

To find Seishiro-san was a goal that not even a thing like eating could deter him from.


	5. Plans

**Series: **X/1999  
**Title: **Plans  
**Rating: **G  
**Pairing/ Characters: **Subaru/Seishiro  
**Word Count: **112  
**Warning/s: **Spoilers for Rainbow Bridge, in an odd way.  
**Disclaimer: **X1999 is not mine

oooooooooo

Seishiro was as ever cautious in his movements, sure to mask his activity, to keep from detection, but truth be told, Subaru had gotten close a couple of times. It was something that kept Seishiro moving – drifting in and out of cities every other year or so. It was a hassle even for a man like him to uproot his life every time he felt his prey getting too close, but it had to be done.

It wasn't time for them to meet again, yet. Subaru-kun wasn't ready. He wasn't sharp enough, strong enough, cruel enough.

No, Seishiro thought, he wasn't ready to become the Sakurazukamori yet. But he would be soon.


	6. Smoke

**Series: **X/1999  
**Title: **Smoke  
**Rating: **PG-13  
**Pairing/ Characters: **Subaru/Seishiro  
**Word Count: **125  
**Warning/s: **None.  
**Disclaimer: **X1999 is not mine.

oooooooooo

Blood and sakura, certainly, but that's underlying, not pervasive. It is the cigarette smoke that swarms his senses, grabbing, holding on, clinging, choking. (breathe) It is thick, noxious, robbing _him_ of life, and Subaru had always disapproved. But _he_ had not taken Subaru's words to heart. (a heart. remember to breathe)

A disgusting odor that Subaru cannot bring himself to hate. (not really, but he tries so hard to hate. breathe deeply, and maybe the smoke won't clog) It is another fragment of memory, and it is one that _possesses_.

(just… breathe…)

He knows he is falling; he cannot hear himself hit the ground.

oooooooooo

_He pulls out another cigarette. Mild Sevens. And he does not care that they are killing him – he is already dead._


	7. Time

**Series: **X/1999  
**Title: **Time  
**Rating: **PG  
**Pairing/ Characters: **Hokuto, Subaru/Seishiro  
**Word Count: **465  
**Warning/s: **None.  
**Disclaimer: **Not mine. Never mine, really.

* * *

The case was not one that could be put away to the side, carelessly, like paperwork. This was Subaru, and when it came to his well being, time was of the utmost essence. Every moment she wasted was an unending abyss for Subaru, and she would not let him drown, even if he wanted to. 

This was Seishiro's fault, true, but it was hers as well. She was, after all, so much less naïve than her brother, and saw al of the warning signs. She should have known what eyes cold as ice and steel could do, and would do, when the time was right.

Hokuto had known, and ignored her own knowledge.

It was easy to track him down, even if she had no magical power to speak of. Intuition was all she needed. There was one place he could not avoid, after all.

He killed her underneath the sakura tree, and with her dying breath, she tried to fix all of the mistakes she had done. Her life was nothing compared to Subaru and Seishiro's happiness, she thought. Maybe her spell would do some good, and at least they would both still be alive.

She was more naïve than she herself knew.

* * *

The case was a painful one, drawn out slowly like a tortuous death. He had quit school, abandoned his dreams, ignored his own health, and estranged his remaining family to hunt down the man who had killed his sister. After all, her memory was the only thing he still held dear; he remembered her smiles and laughter and frivolous soul. 

Seishiro was without a doubt the one to blame, but Subaru was not faultless either. Maybe if he had realized what she had intended sooner, he could have found her and stopped her. Nothing was worth her life.

He knew that she had gone to avenge him, and that he should not have needed to be avenged.

Seishiro was elusive, impossible to track down, although spiritually they were equals. There was one place he could have gone, but he never went to the sakura. Because if he had gone, and Seishiro had been there as well…

That man had killed his sister under that tree, and it had been where they first met. A sakura tree, always in bloom. There would be nothing less fitting than to kill Seishiro there, as he had killed Hokuto.

But if they met, then they would fight. And Subaru… Subaru…

Subaru would kill Seishiro. But the harm had already been done, so he would do so in his own time.

* * *

Seishiro noted how Subaru avoided the obvious place to look, and thought the boy too sentimental. But Seishiro was, as he had proved before, a patient man, and knew to wait until it was time. 


	8. Sakura

**Series: **X1999

**Title: **Sakura  
**Rating: **PG  
**Pairing/ Characters: **Subaru/Seishiro  
**Word Count: **165  
**Warning/s: **Know who they are. Tokyo Babylon spoilers, probably.

**Disclaimer:** Not mine.

* * *

Blood and sakura and the words they were not allowed to say, as ordained by their fate.

Subaru once found a sakura branch, heavily covered with blooming blossoms, on his doormat. It was in the middle of December, pointedly, but it wasn't like Subaru could mistake the sender in any case.

He had cradled them in his arms, and thrown them in the trash.

A week later, there was a branch left on his couch, with part of the twig covered in a dark, sticky substance. If he had been anyone else, Subaru would have though it was only sap, but Subaru was no longer naïve. He threw those out too, and changed the locks.

Seishiro was not so easily deterred.

Subaru entered his apartment, and caught the scent of blood and sakura. He saw Seishiro himself.

He could not throw the man out, and did not wish for the strength to do so.

Instead he played his sister's role, and went to make tea.


	9. Fail

Series: X1999

**Series: **X1999

**Title: **Fail  
**Rating: **PG  
**Pairing/ Characters: **Subaru/Seishiro  
**Word Count: **120  
**Warning/s: **Know who they are. Tokyo Babylon spoilers, probably.

**Disclaimer:** Not mine.

* * *

Seishiro had counted on the fact that hatred would be stronger than love, even in Subaru's case.

Rainbow Bridge was falling apart around them, and Seishiro carried the boy away from it all. Subaru was still breathing, barely, and his wound had stopped bleeding. He would live, surely.

Seishiro left him somewhere _his_ Kamui would find him and left. He was not worried – they were bound by fate and would meet again.

She had misjudged the boy's hate, at any rate, and did not even get to perform his final attack. He had planned on using Hokuto's curse, but Subaru had not lasted long enough for him to do so.

At the very least, Seishiro needed to reassess his situation.


	10. Forever

**Series: **X1999

**Title: **Forever  
**Rating: **PG-13  
**Pairing/ Characters: **Subaru/Seishiro  
**Word Count: **176  
**Warning/s: **Rainbow Bridge.

**Disclaimer:** Not mine.

* * *

Oh, of course he had lost the bet. Perhaps he had lost it even then, on their first meeting, beneath the sakura tree which wept flowers and blood.

Seishiro had known, looking into the eyes of the young child, that on the first day of being the Sakurazukamori, he had met the one who would undo him.

He could never forget Subaru – not in this life, death, dimension. Subaru would haunt him forever.

Seishiro had thought this supremely unfair, and resolved to be equally memorable to Subaru.

He wanted to be more than a mentor, friend, lover, nemesis. All of those were forgettable, after all, even if a couple were bound to leave an aftertaste. They were, independently or together, not enough.

He made Subaru love him, and became a reason for the boy to smile.

He killed Hokuto, and because Subaru's reason for life.

He whispered three beautiful, heartbreaking words as concrete crumbled around them, his life draining from him and his vision darkening, and by the tears in Subaru's eyes, he could taste success.


End file.
